Survivor: Exile Island

Non-Twist Fever! 02.06.06

Survivor: Exile Island has begun, and the only person we want to force into exile is the only one we can't: host Jeff Probst.

Quitting Time 02.13.06

Life on the island is never predictable – but the detestable personalities involved usually are. Coach Probst puts them to the test, and we report the results. (Print. Poop. Read.)

Terry Rejoice! 02.21.06

A completely random draw made Terry captain of La Mina's kickball pick, and he's still drunk with power – meanwhile, Bruce becomes the exiliest player in history, and Bobby... does what needs doing.

Lost in La Mina 03.01.06

Strategy is quickly taking shape at La Mina beach, and that strategy is: Obey Terry. Terry wants a post-merge voting blitzkrieg. Betray Terry's wishes at your own peril.

Jokers Wild 03.08.06

The wheels are coming off at Casaya – and, baby, they're coming off with a vengeance.

"Houston, we have a problem." 03.16.06

NASA-level smarts won't help you on Survivor. The only background that prepares you for this is bartender, or pharmaceutical rep.

The State of Survivor 04.11.06

With eight contestants remaining, we're halfway through the thinning of this year's Survivor herd – a nice time to take stock of who's left. (Also, in politics, they say that for every letter you receive you should assume there are 1,000 constituents with the same opinion who didn't take the time to write. By that logic, over a thousand of you demanded the return of the onebee Survivor column!)

Can Terry Do It? 04.20.06

(Where "it" is "win Survivor: Exile Island.") Realistically, no. Of course he can't. But in terms of awesome television? Maybe.

Aras? Fuck. 05.15.06

I completely forgot to TiVo the Survivor finale last night. (Instead I was watching Grey's Anatomy while four episodes of Veronica Mars awaited me on the TiVo. I don't know who I am any more.) I never got around to watching the preceding three Thursday episodes, but I was kind of curious to see how things played out.