Survivor: Vanuatu

Islands of Fire 09.22.04

With 18 new competitors to meet, the opening episode of Survivor: Vanuatu feels less like adventure-based reality and more like class picture day. Still, even without much time to learn about each other, they quickly clique up and start alienating one another.

Goodbye Dolly! 10.05.04

In a Survivor episode that aired weeks and weeks ago, life on the island begins to wear on people, the reward and immunity challenges are miraculously separated into two separate events, and we see further breakdowns in the "youth alliances."

Mia Culpa 10.06.04

This week on Survivor, the personality clashes are kicked into overdrive and the twists are heaped on like a delicious helping of Pistol Whip. Probst, ever the gracious host, officiates two Tribal Councils, but it's still not enough to weed out the annoying personalities.

Just Visiting 10.14.04

Twist! Here, twisty twisty! (Sorry, I'll be right with you.) Twiiiiiiist! Twisty? C'mon, twisty! (I'm trying to coax a twist out of hiding, to shake up this fucking unbearable season of Survivor.)

3-2-1, Merge! 10.21.04

Burnett lazily smooshes the teams together and separates them out as newly mingled coed groups. All this astonishing twist means is that the Survivor merge is imminent.

One Man Show 10.28.04

Royry's starting to feel the numbers pinch on Yasur, but as sticky as his problem is, it's nothing that can't be solved with a little theatre!

Disco Inferno 11.04.04

Royry's given up on the theatre, and moved headlong into Great White-style deadly pyrotechnics! Plus, Mr. McFeely brings letters from home! And not one of them is for Jenna Lewis.

Yasser Is Dead! Long Live Yasur! 11.12.04

I'm still beaming from the solid blindsiding that smacked a smug and self-righteous Royry to the ground last week, and things just keep getting worse for the idiot men of Survivor: Vanuatu.

Soap Opera-ville 11.29.04

Don't watch Survivor? God bless you. But this is your chance to read the cursory update on where the hell I've been, if you're curious. Also, The Amazing Race commences!

Cacophony of Emotion 12.02.04

Survivor continues not to be over, and The Amazing Race continues to be vastly more entertaining. But, the alliances are in flux! You can't deny the drama inheren– zzzzzzz

Swear Jar 12.07.04

Survivor goes under the live blogging knife – laid out that way, it's harder to deny that exactly sixty minutes have been wasted forever – and The Amazing Race rolls merrily along.

Greetings from Vanuatu! 12.10.04

We get a sneak peek at a letter home from the island of fire – meanwhile, the elderly are being spared from Amazing Race elimination by cruel fate.

Is It Over? 12.13.04

A slightly different reality to ponder. Instead of intending to write the Survivor finale recap and never getting around to it, I'm doing my homework early.