Fri, August 29, 2008

The savvy among us have already noticed that within mere days, a new television season will be upon us. In recent years, the concept of the "television season" has undergone considerable change. Shows that once would have languished at the bottom of the ratings for three to six months are now canceled within weeks (and usually with good reason), resulting in openings quickly filled by more new shows. Where once there was a season, a mid-season, and a summer of repeats and battles of various network stars, there now exists a sort of year-round season – an eternal spring, where something new is always in bloom. It makes sense, really: TV comes from Hollywood, and it's always springtime there.

Even so, TV networks still have incentive to group a few shows together for release in the fall. It takes time and effort, and no small amount of money, to haul out the hype machine, wipe down its gleaming exoskeleton, sharpen its blades, and oil its massive claws. Once it's out, why not get the most bang for the buck, and deploy several shows at once? Considering the uptick in returning shows due to last year's strike-foreshortened half-season, the networks are releasing fewer new shows than ever. But still they exist, which means they must be cataloged, evaluated, and ranked. And, for those without access to a TCA membership (who needs those stodgy goons, anyhow?), these shows must first be TiVo'd. Thus: the Annual TiVo Gauntlet of New Fall Programming.

New to this year's ATGoNFP: cable shows! In today's ever-complexifying mediascape (iTunes, Hulu, BitTorrent, "mini-sodes," what have you), the television audience has fractured and redefined itself. Networks, too distracted by corporate turnover and a reality-based cash grab, have been slow to respond to viewers who demand choice, quality, and consistency. Cable channels have stepped in to fill the void. Since cable is now where the quality is, it makes sense to include their offerings. (Since the quality is only there in the summer, it doesn't make much sense to include their fall offerings; the system is not without its kinks.)

One of the first rules of approaching any gauntlet is: be prepared. For a TiVo gauntlet, this means schedules – a grid to display the programming week in one view, with premiere dates attached; and a chronological list of premiere dates, to expedite the recording and reviewing of new shows. Attached to each program is a rating of quality – in the case of new shows, a prediction based on available materials from the hype machine.

2008 Guide to Fall TV Premieres [113k PDF]
2008 Schedule of Fall TV Premieres [106k PDF]

What To Look For

If you're a fan of police procedurals but find it boring for them all to be exactly the same, but find it confusing for them to be too different, you're in luck. From CBS's The Mentalist and Eleventh Hour to ABC's Life on Mars to Fox's Fringe, you have your choice of slightly-varied cop shows on a spectrum of paranormality from quirky to downright pants-shitting. If you like Gossip Girl, the only breakout hit the CW network has had since it sprung from the womb of UPN/WB, they've got you covered, with three new shows about rich and/or beautiful people frolicking and/or running amok. 90210, about which the less said the better; Privileged, which takes some of the steamy edge off Gossip Girl; and Valentine – a synopsis of which is unavailable, because some juvenile scamps have hacked the CW web site and replaced its description with a fake one involving a dating service run by Greek deities (Aphrodite, Eros, et al) come to Earth undercover. You silly youths! That's simply absurd!

If you like to go from laughing to gagging in the space of less than a minute, CBS Wednesday is the place for you. The network has sandwiched comedies, like the excellent New Adventures of Old Christine, right up against grisly police dramas, like Criminal Minds and CSI: New York. Family sitcoms and serial killers, together at last – and CBS wonders why they've repeatedly failed to establish a comedy beachhead outside Monday nights.

Finally, if you like imagining that you could have been a lawyer if you'd just taken a few night classes, there's Steven Bochco's Raising the Bar on TNT, in which boring stupid people practice law. The show appears to be another bland courtroom ensemble – but its actors repeatedly state that it's swimming with vibrant and fascinating characters. If you spot one in the network's promos for the show, though, you win a shiny penny. So far, they're all pretty standard: virtuous or conniving, with the rumpled suits or finely coiffed hair to match, respectively.

What To Watch

Fringe is the most buzzed-about show on the slate, as it was created by J.J. Abrams, who dazzled us with Alias and the first 20 minutes of Lost, then slowly and methodically eroded our will to live over the next three years. On the other hand, Abrams has been conspicuously absent from any public forum on Lost; its principal masterminds are Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse, who between them can boast Nash Bridges, Briscoe County, Jr., and Crossing Jordan. Abrams has been off making great movies like Mission: Impossible III or great-if-you're-into-that-sort-of-thing movies like Star Trek (2009). Abrams co-created Fringe with Alex Kurtzman and Roberto Orci, who scripted brilliant episodes of Alias, along with the tight and thrilling M:I III and the utterly baffling Transformers. The point is: who the fuck knows what to expect from Fringe? It could be a sleek and fitting reboot of an X-Files type franchise for the post-PATRIOT Act world, or it could collapse under the weight of its own mystique and self-seriousness. Best to tune in and find out for sure.

Privileged (formerly Surviving the Filthy Rich) tells the story of a young woman who is hired to oversee a pair of obscenely wealthy 16-year-old twins in Palm Beach, Florida. Like Gossip Girl, it's based on a young-adult novel, but this one skews more toward the territory of Uptown Girls than Cruel Intentions. As Megan, the tutor, Joanna Garcia (Freaks and Geeks, Reba) has an unassuming charm that may elevate the show above its unsightly premise.

NBC's Kath & Kim will live or die by the chemistry between Molly Shannon and Selma Blair as the titular mother-daughter duo. They'll be aided by John Michael Higgins, who never fails to be excellent – but can his excellence outshine Molly Shannon doing a character voice?

My Own Worst Enemy was created by the same guy who wrote the snappy and engaging Lucky Number Slevin (which simply never stops being fun to pronounce!), and early evidence indicates it could go either way between interesting identity-bending action-drama or pale half-formed nonsense.

The real quality will be found on extraordinary shows whose debut seasons were unfortunately cut short by last year's WGA strike, like Life and Pushing Daisies, so don't be sad if it doesn't seem like there's much to look forward to in the new releases.

Premiering Next Week

Raising the Bar: TNT, Monday at 10:00
90210: CW, Tuesday at 8:00
Sons of Anarchy: FX, Wednesday at 10:00
Hole in the Wall: Fox, Sunday at 8:00
True Blood: HBO, Sunday at 9:00

Returning Next Week

Entourage: HBO, Sunday at 10:00

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