Fri, February 9, 2007

Four years ago, I answered this dumb e-mail chain letter on a lark. A spam comment brought it back to my attention, and I thought it would be amusing to update it and see how much has changed.

–- Begin forwarded message –-

OK, here is what you are supposed to do and don't be lame and spoil the fun. Copy (not forward) this entire e-mail and paste it onto a new e-mail that you will send. Change all of the answers so that they apply to you. Then, send this to a whole bunch of people you know INCLUDING me. The theory is that you will learn a lot of little known facts about your friends and yourself as well.

1. LIVING ARRANGEMENTS?
   one-bedroom apartment in Los Angeles's Miracle Mile
   2-bedroom condo in sunny Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida

2. WHAT ARE YOU CURRENTLY READING?
   Catch Me If You Can by Frank Abagnale, Jr. and The Salmon of Doubt by Douglas Adams
   McSweeney's #20. Up next: Malcolm Gladwell's Blink, Crichton's Next, Chris Elliott's Shroud of the Thwacker, and about a dozen others I've been dying to get to.

3. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
   The Powerpuff Girls
   A Dell logo, of all things.

4. FAVORITE BOARD GAME?
   Scrabble (Taboo, if party games count)
   Risk for games played on a board; Beyond Balderdash for games played around a board; Taboo for games played without a board.

5. FAVORITE MAGAZINE?
   Premiere
   Wired, by a huge margin.

6. FAVORITE SMELLS?
   Herbal Essences shampoo

7. FAVORITE SOUND?
   Laughter

8. WHAT IS THE WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD?
   Loneliness
   Writer's block.

9. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP?
   "Man, the girl in the next apartment gets up early. And what is she wearing, clogs?"
   "I hate everything about my life." (This is literally true, but I swear it passes after the first few minutes.)

10. FAVORITE COLOR(S)?
    Blue
    Or possibly green. I don't think about a favorite color very much.

11. HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE?
    Two if I'm expecting a call; let the machine get it otherwise
    I should just unplug the home phone. I only have the line so I can plug TiVo into it, and only solicitors call me on it. So I always let the machine get it. I answer the cell phone pretty quickly, but it doesn't really have "rings." This is one of those questions that was dumb enough to begin with, but is quickly being rendered moot by technology.

12. FUTURE CHILD'S NAME?
    7, Polaris, Cæsar, Kevin
    You'd better believe those still stand. The first one is an absolute deal breaker – one reason I will probably never marry.

13. WHAT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN LIFE?
    Companionship
    Making a contribution to the world.

14. FAVORITE FOOD(S)?
    Cake with chocolate icing

15. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?
    Chocolate

16. DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE FAST?
    Yes

17. DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL?
    No

18. WHAT TYPE OF CAR DO YOU HAVE?
    Volvo
    Audi

19. IF YOU COULD MEET ONE PERSON DEAD OR ALIVE, WHO WOULD IT BE?
    Spielberg
    Douglas Adams.

20. FAVORITE DRINK(S)?
    Coke
    (And how!)

21. ZODIAC SIGN?
    Capricorn
    That'll never change, baby!

22. DO YOU EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI?
    I barely eat the sprouts.
    I sometimes eat the sprouts. (Progress!) Also, I will eat a pound or two of broccoli tempura if you put it in front of me.

23. IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB YOU WANTED, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
    Layout Supervisor at Pixar

24. WHAT COLOR DO YOU DYE YOUR HAIR IF YOU DYE YOUR HAIR?
    n/a

25. EVER BEEN IN LOVE?
    Practically every day
    Plenty of times; it was fun while it lasted.

26. IS THE GLASS HALF EMPTY OR HALF FULL?
    half empty
    half emptier!

27. FAVORITE MOVIE(S)?
    Jurassic Park
    The Shawshank Redemption
    North By Northwest
    These remain near the top of the list. Add Contact and The Incredibles.

28. WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED?
    Empty boxes and boxes of toys and gift wrap
    Absolutely nothing. It's paradise!

29. YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER?
    7

30. WHAT'S THE LAST SONG YOU HAVE HEARD TODAY?
    "Hawaii Five-O Theme" by The Ventures
    "Blind Love" by Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band (don't you dare judge me)

31. PERSON YOU SENT THIS TO THAT IS MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
    Yeah, like I'm sending this to people.
    KOTC. (Where has that fucker been lately?)

32. PERSON YOU SENT THIS TO THAT IS LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
    Um, me.
    Oops! I guessed that one wrong. Let me change that to "me, within the next four years."

1 Comment (Add your comments)

Brandon — Fri, 2/9/07 12:48pm

WHAT IS THE WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD? Loneliness Writer's block.

And thousands of writers everywhere laugh in bitter commiseration.

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