Fri, November 14, 2003
What, Me Worry?
"We'll think about our votes next week." (Other than Ryno, surprisingly few spoilers.)
Burnett is doing that thing again. The thing where he edits the show so heavily that any concept you might have of what's going on turns out to be completely mistaken. It started in season two, and it's the main reason I quit watching Survivor pretty much completely after that. It's aggravating as hell, because it would be more interesting to watch all the various schemes that lead up to Ryan's elimination, rather than only watching the ones that indicated someone else might get the boot. It's not "suspense," it's "misdirection." Despite all the various proposals, Ryan ended up being a unanimous vote; I think there's an interesting story there.
However, I've been watching fairly closely this season, and we've definitely had our share of overwhelmingly boring episodes, so maybe this is just another week in which the editors simply have no useful footage at their disposal. Then again, it's entirely possible that my perception of the episode as a whole has been affected by Burton's indication that he'd like to be in the final three with Lil and Jon. Jon?!? I've been vomiting regularly ever since this came up, and it's hard to focus on anything else.
All right, enough bellyaching. They're not paying me to whine and bitch about how badly the show is put together. (Of course, they're not paying me to write my universally-adored weekly column about it either, so who cares about they?!)
The reason I believe this episode has potential is that events continue to unfold which explore the dynamic between the two original teams. I'm not any Survivor history buff, but from what I gather, this year the "tribeyness" is more pronounced than ever. Due in large part to Rupert. By which I mean, they've maintained their identity as Drake and Morgan even within the new Balboa team. And Drake (plus Lil, who is arguably defecting from Morgan, but I would say is actually returning to a different game as a new player and responding to the landscape that now exists) dealt Morgan a death blow by eliminating scruffy, whiny, useless Andrew. One approach that has worked in the past is to continue eliminating Morgan members, one by one. However, it's possible that what's left of Morgan may dissolve now that Andrew has been eliminated and the concept of the "every man for himself" post-merge game becomes apparent.
Well, what's interesting about Morgan is this: they are lazy. Lazy to the point that they defend their laziness at TribCon. Now, I've been known to engage in laziness from time to time. What capitalist American infidel TiVo-owner hasn't? I'm not so crazy as to try to defend that. But Darrah is. And she and Tijuana have had it pretty good so far, so they see no reason to change their approach. Sure, it was lame that their laziness led to malnutrition, but that's over now. Drake will feed them, and they can just hang out. So they do. ("If it ain't broke...") Ryan deserves credit (first time ever!) for reading the winds and realizing that he may as well try to do something. He approaches Burton to see if he can line up a bloc against Rupert, which is odd because Burton has absolutely nothing to gain from this, and is in a pretty good position on his own right now. It always boggles me when people who have no influence at all try to appeal to someone in power like this. In the real world, this isn't such a crazy idea, but on Survivor, everyone is playing the game for the money. So, if Burton helps Ryan, he's just offering Ryan a chance at the money and decreasing his own shot. Silliness! I guess maybe you just try to form alliances to pass the time. Whatever.
It would be fun to go on the show and just make alliances all day, every day. I'd even take a 3-ring binder as my luxury item and chart it all like Dat Phan. The key is getting on the show. I'll have to use one of those reality-TV placement agencies. But even for them a flaccid twenty-something caucasian loser from LA has got to be a tough sell.
Of course, Ryan's needling leads to Burton's obligatory interview that all his allegiance to the Drake team is just for show. Well, duh. But don't get your head too swollen, bud. You've been playing mighty nice with them. Rupert is a bigger threat than Andrew, and you still sided with Rupert to vote Andrew out of the game last week, when you had the chance to do either. With Lil in your pocket you represent a hell of a swing vote.
Anyway, Tijuana and Darrah clearly aren't too lazy, because somehow they end up voting with everyone else against Ryan. Another reason the deceptive editing is a pain. What happens with those two? Does someone just wander up and say "Vote Ryno. See ya."? Or are they involved in an actual discussion? From the look of next week, they begin to assimilate into the shifting Balboa dynamic, so maybe so. All we see this week is lying around.
And by the way, not to get too wrapped up in the previews for next week – talk about deceptive editing! – but there's not much from this week's show, so I'm following breadcrumbs... this is why they should have voted Jon out weeks ago! Keeping him around only provides more opportunities for him to stir the sluggish into mutiny. Damn it! What happened to that plan from last week where they were going after him once Andrew was gone? That was a good plan. Jon is vile. Vile with a capital V on each shoulder. Nobody wants him to win, and keeping him around this late in the game hugely increases the chance of that accidentally happening. A personal immunity or two and he could gain control of an alliance that sees him through to the end. Please don't let this happen! The hate-bot would be very disappointed. (Did everyone see him at the reward challenge, needlessly haranguing Jon for busting out of the competition? Good!)
See? There's real potential! All of this is going on, but what we see is chunks of footage of every possible group scheming to eliminate someone from every other possible group. Burton and Lil are after Rupert or Christa. Jon is after everybody. Ryan is after Rupert. Sandra and Christa are after Rupert. Rupert wins immunity (surprise!) and everyone's backup plan is just to pretend nothing's happening and vote with Rupert?! This is the way undeserving competitors get ahead on Survivor, people! I'm not saying Rupert is undeserving, but we've seen this before. Everyone has a master plan which depends on a very unlikely turn of immunity, and then once that doesn't come true, the whole group reverts to default mode and plans to reset their scheme for the following week. Meanwhile, one of them is voted out of the game, and the voting dynamics are slowly shifting. It surprises me that, if Drake is as smart as they've shown themselves to be, there's no contingency for an immune Rupert. (For that matter, it surprises me that, if they really want him out, they didn't get the Morgan people to put more coconuts in his trough and ensure his vulnerability. I know they couldn't do it themselves because he'd start yelling at them, but if Morgan does it, it's defensible as the only semi-strategy they have.)
Which brings us, more or less, to TribCon. (There's a reward challenge in there, but I'm ignoring it because food rewards are so pointless and this is the one where it's about the secret strategy time more than the actual food. Plus, they do the challenge in heats, which is way too common this year and I don't like it.) I'm proud of Christa for giving specific answers to Probst's questions, because for so long everyone has been vague about their criticism of other players and that just seems dumb to me. Now, the problem is, we don't see her voicing this criticism to Darrah and Tijuana back at camp, so it seems like she's just passive-agressively bitching at them through Probst, like he's her mom. Bad form. This will need to be cleaned up by next week, because with the jury thing starting up, TribCon is going to take on some added significance, and politics will come into play. Which brings to mind an interesting point – this whole jury thing. I'm hoping it gets hit by a twist of its own, because it's due for a shake-up. But, besides that, what is the strategy for dealing with the jury? I mean, talking to them at TribCon I understand. You want to make the best case for the votes you cast so that you don't seem mean. I'm referring to their treatment before they're in the jury. For instance, Ryan. He'll be back, to vote for the final winner, and he'll have a chip on his shoulder about being eliminated. How do you get him to vote for you? If you're Morgan (Ha! Like they'll have any representation in the final two.) you hope that's enough, but aside from pre-merge team favoritism, how do you get on someone's good side? Are they more likely to respect you if you clue them in ahead of time that you're voting for them? Does it help to tell them that you may vote for them based on whose alliance you need, but it won't be personal? No matter what alliance you make, you'll inevitably break it at some point. So is there any strategy which can help you for the final vote, or must you simply take your chances?
I want to see if the inception of the jury stage changes the camp dynamic. I would like to believe that someone like Jon who is simultaneously playing all sides will necessarily suffer from the jury system, but Richard Hatch won, so clearly the final vote doesn't look as unfavorably on smug, scheming punks as I do.
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